In Dark Times
by tinynarna
Summary: Life had been going smoothly for Misaki, until an accident strikes and in turn sets off a wave of disasters. Shattering one thing after another. In these dark times, even the strongest person needs someone to turn to.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:**

**I do not own Fujiwara Hiro's series Kaichou wa Maid-Sama!**

But if I did... 'evil grin'

_Thoughts – _are in italic

"Baka" - 'Idiot' in Japanese

I apologise in advance if it seems OOC. But alas we haven't had one of these situations come up in the manga, so it is hard to stay true to the characters personality when I have nothing to base it on.

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><p><strong>1<strong>**.**

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><p><strong>Usui POV<strong>

Beautiful.

It was late afternoon and the sun was slowing dipping lower in the sky, directing beams of light into the student council room. The rays bouncing off the walls and floor, casting everything it touched in a warm glow. And sitting directly in the middle, in all her glory was Misaki.

Golden light reflected off her brown hair as she moved it behind her ear. There was a flash of amber glancing up before they settled intently back on the paperwork laid out in front of her. A quick rub of her temple, then she was back into her routine of lip biting and pen scribbling. Oblivious to her surroundings and in particularly a blonde haired male who was sitting a few meters to her side.

Usui, as always, was currently occupying the seat near the window intending to read, letting Misaki concentrate on her council work. But he was struggling to focus on the contents of his book when he had such a sight in front of him. For the last forty minutes Usui hadn't been able to remove his eyes from the girl sitting near him. Almost mesmerised by the way the light danced off her features. Every movement from the flick of her hair to pensive furrow of her brow was added to Usui's memory. He knew his staring wouldn't have gone unnoticed by Misaki though she purposely tried to ignored him whenever he was around.

It was a peaceful meeting. All that could be heard were the soft murmurs of the council members behind him and the frantic scratching of pen on paper. With a quick glance over his shoulder, Usui smirked at how careful the council members were trying to be in fear of not disrupting their Presidents concentration. It was true the beautiful golden creature in front of him had a demon persona. But that was usually brought on by being aggravated. Mainly when it came to males...

_'Especially when it came to males.'_

To Usui that just added to part of her charm.

_'She really has me messed up.'_

Getting himself comfy again, Usui rested his head on his propped up arm, and fell back into his trance.

Since Misa's confession at Christmas, they had been a couple for the last few months. Only telling the people closest to them about their relationship. During this time their level of intimacy had increased, much to Usui's delight. Misa was starting to get comfy with the hand-holding and hugging, and lately she's even initiated a few kisses. But still, Usui's surprise "attacks" still caught her unguarded which ended with him getting a growling and a physical blow to the head.

Feeling the eyes on her the whole time, Misaki's patience wore thin and finally looked up in Usui's direction to give him a scolding, only to see the look of absolute adoration present on his face. A gentle smile appeared on his features when the object of his attention developed a soft blush.

With a deep sigh. "Usui don't you have somewhere else to be?"

"There's no where else I'd rather be, Pres." Usui teased.

"Baka-." Misa mumbled under her breath as her blush deepened.

Usui just grinned as he watched her attempt to hide her glowing features. But his focus was distracted by the brisk footsteps approaching the council rooms closed door, his back straightening when it opened.

"Miss Ayuzawa?"

Misaki and the rest of the room all looked up from their work. Standing there with a nervous expression was the schools Principal. From his spot opposite the entry, Usui could just make out two men in uniform standing behind the Principal.

"I'm sorry to interrupt Misaki, but we need to talk with you privately for a moment," facing the class with a gesture. "Please continue with the topic your working on."

Concerned, Misa stood and quietly walked to the door, pausing slightly as the Principal stepped aside to let her pass. Like the silent body guard he was, Usui casually moved to lean against the wall beside the door. Out of hearing range but still within visible sight, curious to what they would need to talk "privately" about with Misaki.

Normally Usui wouldn't invade his girlfriends privacy in this way. But it was the two men in uniform that got him worried. The overprotective nature in Usui screamed at him to be nearby if ever she needed help.

A quick glance up, and he noticed that he wasn't the only one concerned with Misa's sudden absence. The student council members were whispering amongst themselves and trying to sneak glances through the doors window. Yukimura, the timid Vice-President, had been standing from his seat as soon the Principal had arrived. Now stood rooted to the spot, fingers clutching his pen, his eyes met with Usui's for a moment before before casting downwards. From the other side of the room, it was enough for Usui to see the worry deep within them.

With a sigh Usui turned his focus back on Misaki through the door. Glad to see that they hadn't moved out of visible range. But what increased his concern was that now he could identify the men in uniform.

_'What would the police need to talk about with Misa?'_

Usui watched as both of the men removed their hats, each of their expressions sombre. The Principal fidgeting on the spot, looking unsure on how to handle the situation. Misaki noticing her headmasters discomfort, only adding to her own nerves. Usui watched her eyes flick to each of the men around her, waiting for one of them to start talking. Finally settling on the taller of the two officers who cleared his throat and spoke.

It wasn't loud enough for Usui to pick up any of the conversation, but he didn't need to just by judging Misaki's reactions. He new something has gone terribly wrong. Her fingers pulling at the hem of her skirt, face paling, lips parted, quick short breaths. He watched her mouth try and form words, only to fail. Misaki's hair covered her eyes as she looked down. Usui found himself gripping the wall behind him.

"Pres is ok, right? She's strong, she can handle anything. She'll be ok." Yukimura muttered quietly as he stood next to Usui by the door, both sets of eyes fixed outside. Usui was unsure whether Yukimura was asking him a question, or just reassuring himself. But at the this point he didn't care, he gave no response and edged closer to the door.

_'Misa. Misa-chan. Look up. Let me see your ok. Please look up. Misaki.'_

Usui could feel the forming tension tighten in his gut as the second officer started talking, moving closer to her. Misaki's face still hidden. Clenched fists trembled.

_'"She's strong, she can handle anything."'_

Yukimuras words echoed through Usui's head. All sounds around Usui faded out. The soft whispers, the pen on paper, the afternoon breeze through the window. All faded out.

_'"She'll be ok."'_

He felt the pain deep within him as he watched her shaking form. Arms folded around her midsection, as if recovering from a stitch. His hands tightened on the door handle when he saw Misaki twitch as the policeman talking stepped closer.

_'"Pres is ok, right?"'_

Usui had never seen this kind of Misaki before. He'd seen Maid-Misaki, President-Misaki, Sports Carnival-Misaki, cosplaying-Misaki, Butler-Misaki, kind, caring, stubborn, blushing, hard worker, morale boosting, man-hating, butt-kicking Misaki. But not this kind. Not distressed Misaki.

The Officers and the Principal were quietly discussing amongst one another, motioning towards Misaki, who was looking unsteady on her feet. Barely holding herself together. Her hair swaying in front of her face as she shook her head slowly from side to side. Usui's chest constricted in pain, the tension splintering, the lights dimmed around him and all he could see is Misaki. All he could focus on was his Misa.

_'Look up Misa.'_

Then everything next seemed to happen in slow motion. The Principal moved towards Misaki, arm outstretched in an act of support. With a jolt Misaki stepped back into the wall, hair flicked aside for a moment. And Usui's building tension shattered at that one quick glance up. The door was pushed open and he was by her side in an instant before she slide to the floor. With a strong arm wrapped around her back and his fingers gently brushed aside her hair, revealed a colourless face and glazed eyes.

"Misaki, whats happened? Whats going on?" Usui whispered.

Misaki turned her wide, amber eyes to his, her strong fingers clenched to his shirts front. Lips opened and closed as she's tried to give him an answer but only managing to choke out his name once before her head sank to his shoulder. His gentle hands rubbed her back as he whispered words of reassurance in Misaki's ear.

"Ah, are you a close friend of Miss Ayuzawa?" The taller officer stepped forward and questioned Usui quietly.

"I'm her boyfriend actually" Usui replied without looking up.

"Officers, Mr Usui here is one of our top ranking students in the school. He's also been close with Miss Ayuzawa over the past year." The Principal supplied as the policemen nodded in response.

"Well if thats the case then it may be best if you came with us and Miss Ayuzawa. It would be good for her if she was with someone supportive." The office softly stated. Usui looked up then with a questionable look, waiting for someone to give him some answers. He felt his shirt strain more as Misaki's grip tightened.

Crouching down next to the couple the Principal looked gravely at Usui.

"There was a serious car accident. The cars involved were going at a dangerous speed and flipped onto the pedestrian side walk. Ms Ayuzawa and Suzuna were amongst the civilians that got hit. Some of them are seriously injured, most didn't survive. Misaki's mother-, " The Principle swallowed looked down for a moment to compose himself before continuing. "The officers are taking Misaki to the hospital to see her sister."

Usuis eyes widen in shock. He couldn't think of anything to say. He just held Misaki tighter.

"Miss Ayuzawa was just on the outskirts of the impact. She's in a coma."

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><p>End of chapter 1.<p>

Thank you for reading ! :)

- tinynarna -


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:**

I do not own Fujiwara Hiro's series Kaichou wa Maid-Sama!

_Thoughts – _are in italic

Thank you for all the reviews! I do hope you enjoy this next chapter, written completely from Misakis POV.

I found myself trying to step into Misakis shoes and imagining what I would feel like emotionally if I had lost my own family. Didn't like that feeling whatsoever!

**2.**

**Misaki POV**

It felt like water.

Going downstream at speed, moving with everyone else in the same direction. Couldn't stop as there nothing to grab, to pull up and out from this current. Only a warm, strong hand to guide me through the debris. To shield me from any further harm. Keeping me afloat so I could breath.

I was only dimly aware of being lead down the school corridors. Only the sound of rubber heels meeting vinyl echoed within my head. Emptying my mind of anything else. I couldn't think, I couldn't form any thought process. I should be frustrated, upset or more focused on my surroundings. Anything really. At least try to concentrate but I can't feel myself. Was I actually even moving? Must be. The repetitive squeaking of shoes on floor continues.

_Try and focus. _

_Think. _

It must be one of those dreams. Or nightmares. Were your body is moving on its own. You have no control.

The squeaking on green vinyl. Its making my head throb. I can feel that. Stop! Stop the noise! It hurts!

This is no dream.

My vision clears a little. Two men in front. Cant see their faces. Two men in uniforms. Wait what are they doing in school? Why are police here? I shake my head a little. A serious accident. Right.

Involving a few cars. Hitting civilians. Killing innocents.

_Mum. Suzuna?_

_Oh god!_

_My chest burns._

_Oh god._

Walls started closing in around me, claustrophobia setting in. Held my breathe as I felt the panic sink in, the narrowing hallway swallowing me whole. Im scared. I needed to get out. I needed to see my family. Needed to find them. Vision is blurring. I couldn't see where I was going. The hallway had vanished. Everything is burning. Scorching my insides. The pain is unbearable and I try to fight off the urge to go foetal. I could feel myself suffocating, I needed an escape. I need help.

_This isn't real. This isn't real. Not real._

_Please!_

_Mum! _

_Suzuna!_

When I came to a sudden halt my surroundings didn't. The dizziness causing my head to pound, leaden limbs weighing me down. Drowning me. I felt so weak and useless. Close to letting my frustration yell out as my face was tilted upwards. My vision clearing enough to make out familiar green eyes, looking deep into my own. I heard my name spoken, was reminded to breath. With a shudder, I let go of that air I was still holding on to. Slowly in and out. The light headedness slowly evaporated as oxygen circulated through blood streams. I continued to stare into those hypnotising green eyes as I felt my heart slow down, the panic subsiding. Gentle fingertips moving along my cheekbone before threading themselves into my hair. A soft whisper was spoken before the comforting eyes and warm hand slide away.

I instantly felt the loss of the only warmth I had left. With a gasp I blindly reached out to pull it back until I felt them slowly skim down the backs of my calves, leaving behind a trail of warmth. Heard my name spoken again, so gentle it dulled out the throbbing pain in my head. Grasping the curve of my ankle I felt a tug as my heavy foot was lifted from the ground. Something removed, then replaced before being set down. Then a gentle tug followed on my other foot.

Fingers linked with my own and I was moving again. Gentle caressing of finger tips against knuckles forming a tingly sensation that shot up my numb arm. Emptying my mind again from the thoughts that were plaguing them. Focusing instead on breathing, in and out.

Doors opened suddenly, shocking me out of my thoughts as the bright light shone into my eyes. Temporarily blinding me. It was just another reminder as it burned into my retinas, that I was awake, that I couldn't hide in the darkness which I craved. Behind my protection from the light. I cried out in frustration at my cowardice, picking up my fractured dignity and stepped away from behind my barrier, forward into the light. I found myself fixating on other senses to distract me while my eyes adjusted to the painful brightness. Crunching of pavement under my tread. Soft afternoon breeze lifting my hair around my head. Chirping of birds, and the laughter of school kids leaving in the distant.

Breathing in and out.

I must of been deep in concentration as an engine whirring to life snapped me back to reality. I shook my head to clear my foggy mind and gazed out the window as buildings passed by in a blur. Nameless faces flashing past, all going about their business, shopping, walking home from work, meeting friends. All these people with their own problems.

My sight numbly drifted along the inside of the vehicle. The back of the headrest in front of me, the top of the head of one of the men in uniform peaking out. Slowly drifting along to the front windshield, the grey dashboard, all the complicated control system and two-way radio, to the side profile of the other officer. He looked young with full black hair. Like he's only been on duty of a few years, he looked tired though. I watched his mouth move and form words. Couldn't hear them though. I assume its light conversation. What else is needed to be said?

My eyes drift down to my side at the hand still wrapped around mine. Long, pale, slender fingers tangled with my own, contrasting with the darkness of the seats. Vision travelling up the joined arm to the golden alien next to me. His pale complexion bringing out the green depth of his eyes, his high cheek bones, straight nose and defined jawline. He was strong, smart, borderline perverted and over protective. And he was always there.

Always.

Steady eyes met mine as I quickly looked away. My brown bag at my feet. Don't remember even grabbing it. Because I never did. Usui remembered for me.

My heart wretched.

_'You really do like men who are the complete opposite of your father, don't you Misaki?'_

_Mum!_

Eyes snapped open and found myself now slowly walking upstream. A white corridor with many doors, not the right ones though. Ladies in uniform all over the place, talking to strangers, wheeling others, walking quickly from room to room. Some even giving me a look of sympathy as stumbled by. My limbs struggling to move through the current yet everything moved fast around me. I felt my blood pumping through my veins with every step I took. Felt everything catch up to me. Remembered the reason I was here. Heart beating faster, breath quickening as I pushed forward.

_This isn't real. This isn't real. Not real._

Reached a room with a viewing window. Blood pumping in my head now.

_Just a dream. Please just a dream._

Palms lay flat against the glass, peering in, and then reality slapped me hard in the face.

Too many cords and my little prize-winning sister lying amongst them.

I felt my world shatter.

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><p><p>

End of chapter 2.

Thank you again for the kind reviews.

I must also add that majority of my writing & proofing is done via my phone on the train ride to and from work. So it does take a while for me to write something and edit it since each ride is a quarter of an hour.

- tinynarna -


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:**

I do not own Fujiwara Hiro's series Kaichou wa Maid-Sama!

_Thoughts – _are in italic

_Ah, this chapter has been a long time coming. _

_My apologies. _

_My tardiness was mainly due to work problems and the planning towards my overdue holiday.. which I'm now back from. So with all this out of the way, hopefully that means updates will be quicker. Though, rushing things is not necessarily a good thing since it'll reflect on ones writing._

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><p>3.<p>

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><p><strong>Usui's POV<strong>

Her body looked so small and fragile lying amongst all those cords and rubber piping. Almost like a porcelain doll sleeping in a grown ups bed. With her pale features matching the crisp white of linen sheets, you could hardly tell the difference between what is skin and what was bandages.

I let out a breathe, at least Suzuna looked peaceful despite the serious situation she is in. But for someone so young to be connected to a life support machine, its hard to comprehend just how hard and fast the accident happened. If this was the outcome of just being on the outskirts of the accident, then the victims in the middle had no chance. The uncomfortable thought made me shudder.

Suzuna was lucky, very lucky and also very unfortunate to be there at that exact moment.

I glanced down at the quiet girl to the left of me. Unmoving, hand pressed flat against the glass that separated her from her sister. I couldn't tell what was going through her mind. Her usual expressive face was wiped from all emotion, eyes fixed intently on the bed. I wanted her to say something, anything that would break her silence. Anything that would help me to understand how she was at the moment. It was unnerving not knowing what I could do for her. Or what I could possibly say that would make everything better for Misaki.

But I can't do anything. I can't fix her troubles, I can't wake her sister up. I can't rework the clock and bring her mother back. It makes me want to scream in frustration that I can't do anything besides stand here next to her in silence because I can't even figure out how to react to this situation.

I have never been through anything like this before. I never met my father, and my mother died bringing me into this world. The only sibling I have is a step-brother over in England who I hardly see anyway, and in-turn probably doesn't think of me when it comes to family affection. Theres not even a point in regarding thoughts towards my step father and grandparents. So there was no one who I'm close enough to that would help me understand these feelings. That was until I met Misaki.

I gaze down at her profile. Brown strands of hair that hang above her eyes and frame her face. Straight nose that tilts up slightly at the end. Normally flushed cheeks that are pale in comparison to what they usually were. Her small, pink lips drawn together, her bottom lip being worried by her teeth. To me, she is perfection even if she doesn't know it, and deep down I know she is the one for me. And the thought of losing her in any way, shape or form. No, its unimaginable. My inner door shuts these thoughts out of my head. It would pain me beyond anything possible. I don't know how I could go on with day to day life. Would there even be a point without her?

_'Out of the question. My life would be pointless without her.'_

So I guess what Misaki would be going through would be similar, if not worse. Looking at her now with this understanding I try and analyse her slight facial movements. Confusion? Shock still? To any casual observer Misa may come across as tired with her pale face but I've watched her long enough to see that she's only holding onto her composed face by a thread. Deep within her eyes the fire is wearing as she tries to process what's in front of her.

And I don't even think her mothers death has fully sunken in yet.

_'Oh Misaki...'_

I could feel my heart breaking for her, I know there is nothing I could possibly say to her right now that would help in anyway. The only thing I can and want to do is to stand by her side and just be there. I've resolved myself to the fact that I'll protect her, be the arm to lean on, the shoulder to cry on. I will be here even if she doesn't realise that I am.

There is a long road ahead of her and I want to be there to help Misaki smile again.

When she is ready to.

_'Just one step at a time.'_

I hear soft muttering to my right and I'm reminded that the policemen are still here with us. With a quick glance up the hall, I see that they're not alone. Standing with them is a middle age man, clip board in one hand as he shows the taller of the guards some of the information he is holding. At this point, I've already guessed that he's the doctor. After a few more quiet words the police indicate in our direction, with a nod the doctor makes his way over.

I gently place my hand on Misa's shoulder and give it a slight squeeze in order to not startle her before calling her name.

"Misaki."

When I get no response I try again, leaning forward and whispering "Misa-chan," in her ear.

Her timid eyes slowly draw to me as she responds softly, "Usui. She's.. Suzuna.. s-she's not wa-king up," Misaki's voice shook. "W-what can I do?"

It takes all of my will power to not crush her in my arms then and there. But with her fragile state at the moment I settle with just cupping her warm cheek in my hand.

"Misa your doing everything you can do right now," keeping my voice low. "just stay strong and breath. The doctor's coming, he'll be able to tell you everything you need to know."

With a breath I gently rested my forehead against her own and added softly, "I'm here for you Misa. So if you need anything please just me know, I'm not going anywhere-" I watch as your eyes closed slowly. "Remember that, ok?"

You nod in response just as the doctor gets to where we're standing. With a tug on your hand, your eyes spring open up at me in confusion before focusing on the doctor. His weary eyes directly trained on you as you stand up straighter, ready to hear what he has to say. My gaze flickers down to the mans wonky name tag, reading 'Dr '.

"Miss Ayuwaza, your the older sister of Miss Suzuna Ayuzawa correct?" the doctor spoke. His eyes quickly glanced over at me before returning back as you nodded in reply. "I'm Dr Murata, I'll be looking over your sister until she recovers. But first I think its best if we talk privately in my office for a moment," he quickly gives me a look again. "And we can go through all the details there. I'm sure you have some questions of your own and I'm happy to answer any of them. So if you just step this way-"

"If you don't mind Dr Murata, I would like Usui with me," you interrupt. I look down as your fingers tighten around my own, refusing to let go as you step closer to me. "Please."

Dr Murata notices your hold on me and his hard face softens just a little. "Of course, Miss Ayuzawa, Mr Usui just this way."

Quickly stepping behind the doctor we make our way up the hall way again. Passing Suzunas window, I'm paused briefly by the police. Letting Dr Murata and Misaki walk ahead.

"Mr Usui, we'll need to be heading out now. But if you or Miss Ayuzawa need any other assistance or have any other questions please don't hesitate to give the office a call." the taller policeman spoke.

"Sure okay, thank you for driving us here Mr-," I frown as I don't recall any of their names.

"Oh sorry, we introduced ourselves to Miss Ayuwaza but not to you." the shorter awkwardly scratched his head as he looked up at his partner. He looked back at me with his back up straighter. "I'm Officer Noburu, and this is my superior Sergeant Yuudai."

"We are grateful that Miss Ayuzawa has someone close to depend upon, we have been unsuccessful in locating any of her other family members to pass on the news," Sergeant Yuudai nodded.

My attention was caught to a family sitting further down the hall. The woman was weeping against the mans shoulder while he stroked her hair. A child sat quietly next to the mother, hands clasped together in his lap as he looked down. Old enough to understand, unlike the other younger sibling who sat in front of her mother, clinging to the material of her mothers dress while staring up in wonder at her families distress. Caught up in their own private world of problems.

_'But at the end of the day, they still have each other.'_

"Mr Usui?"

My attention snapped back. "Misaki hasn't mention to me about any other family members since I've known her. As far as I'm aware, I don't think she has any or they live no where nearby." I chose my next words carefully. "I know she has a father, but he disappeared years ago. I'm quite certain the family never kept in contact with him."

"Ah I see. Well thats going to make it extremely difficult for Miss Ayuzawa then, until her sister wakes up." Sergeant Yuudai spoke as he looked in the direction Misaki and the Doctor went. "And they're both still young. But until Miss Suzuna wakes up, Miss Ayuwaza will need full support from the people around her. With no parental guidance, its going to be hard."

I looked down, mainly to hide the pain evident on my face.

"Officer Noburu," sighed the Sergeant.

"Sir." Noburu acknowledged then started sorting through a bag I didn't realise he had hold of.

"We'll walk you to Doctor Murata's office. And then we'll be on our way. We have quite a few more families to visit." Yuudai spoke as he lead me down the hall.

I really didn't want to know, but curiosity got the better of me.

"How many-," I shuddered. "Civilians, didn't make it?"

"Besides Ms Ayuwaza, too many." Yuudai spoke with his jaw clenched. "Too many for an accident of that size. We aren't the only officers passing on the bad news to the civilians families."

"Its an ugly job, but someone needs to do it." Yuudai finished off tiredly as we stood to the side of the office door. Dr Muratas name engraved on a silver plaque mounted next to the frame.

"Mr Usui, these are the items that were in Ms Ayuzawa's possession at the time of the accident." Officer Noburu passed me a small, opaque plastic bag. It was weighty, but I didn't look inside. I really just wanted to get back to Misaki.

"Could you please pass them onto Miss Ayuzawa. They were the only items that we could retrieve off Ms Ayuzawa's body." Noburu continued, "Miss Suzuna's belongings were on her when she was brought into the hospital."

"Again, we are very sorry for bringing such bad news to Miss Misaki Ayuzawa, and our deepest sympathy for the loss of her mother, Ms Ayuwaza." Both Yuudai and Noburu bowed.

"Miss Suzuna is in very good hands with Dr Murata. If you have questions, Dr Murata is well experienced so he'll have all the answers for you. But if there is anything else you need, please call us at the head office," with a final note Yuudai added, "Also please make sure Miss Ayuzawa gets home safely. Have a safe night Mr Usui."

I remained silent as they gave a final nod. With a turn, Sergearnt Yuudai and Officer Noburu continued down the hall. I watched until they disappeared around the corner. My fingers gripping the handle of the bag containing Misaki's mothers belongings tightly. To the left of me was the open door of Dr Murata's office, from my angle it looked dark inside. To my right, further up the hall, was the family from before. Still sitting with one another in a comforting silence.

I don't know how long I stood there observing, but I eventually end up making eye contact with the man. No words are spoken, no words are need. But he gives me a slight nod in acknowledgement as he continues to hold the woman. And I nod back.

Eyes drift back to the office again. Yes its dark, but Misaki is in there.

With that, I walked inside and closed the door behind me.

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><p><em>Opinions? Comments?<em>

_All feedback is helpful, writing in the dark is not._

_Chapter 4 shouldn't be too far away._

_Thank you to the readers and reviewers in advance, and have a lovely day._

_X_

_-tinynarna-_


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:**

I do not own Fujiwara Hiro's series Kaichou wa Maid-Sama!

_Thoughts – _are in italic

_My apologies for the long wait._

_Too much has been going on in my life in these last 6 months in which I last updated. Work has been hectic and my personal life has been through a blender. I even lost a family member._

_I find myself coming home mentally exhausted and uninspired to write or do any art whatsoever._

_But everything's getting a bit better now, and I can see blue skies ahead..._

_I give you my next chapter._

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><p>4.<p>

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><p><strong>Misaki's POV<strong>

The dimly lit office felt more like a closest to me, with too much furniture jammed into such limited space. The blinds hanging from the window partially closed as they filtered through the last of the evening sun. Lighting up the grey desk off to the side though shadowing the rest of the room. The surface covered with mountains of paperwork, a familiar sight to me, though these sheets contents were of more importance. A monitor sat to the side of the papers, stationary and equipment strewn across the rest of the available surface. In front were a set of cushioned chairs facing the desk, overflowing bookshelves and filing cabinets lining the walls. And what I assumed to be a light box stand, crammed in the only free corner.

Dr Murata led me over to the pair of chairs on the opposite side of his desk. Before being asked, I sat quietly on the edge of one, dropping my bag on the floor next to my feet. The thud echoing loudly from the bounce, though oddly muted to what felt like cotton filling my ears. Letting out a deep breath, I did my best to clear the haze from my mind and to focus on the present. It felt like wading through water, trying to get to dry ground. Sluggish but slow.

Another deep breath released. I watched as the Doctor walked around to his side of the desk, placing his clip board down as he dropped himself tiredly into his chair. His fingers started to organise the appropriate papers on the surface in front of him. The movement stirring up dust that rest there on top. My eyes following the group of particles as they journeyed up through the air catching the light, before descending downwards and out of sight. Shutting my eyes tightly, I willed my mind to focus again. Exhaling once more, I took the chance to examine the man taking care of my sister.

Dr Murata wasn't young nor was he old. Lines were beginning to etch onto his face, and patches of grey scattered amongst dishevelled, black hair. Even in the dull of the room you could make out the redness of his eyes and the dark circles rimming beneath. Proof that it has been a long and tiring day for him. His off-white coat looking rumpled in places from the long wear and his tie loosened around his neck. The Doctor looked like he needed a comfy bed more then anything.

Doubt was beginning to formed in my scrambled head. Was he capable in looking after my sister? Would he be able to give her his full attention in helping her recover? Is he too tired? Will Suzuna get better? My growing concern of the Doctors wellbeing flooded my mind with endless questions. If he wasn't at one hundred percent would he get careless, will I then be all alone?

_'Alone.'_

The word made my heart thud painfully within my chest. I didn't like the feeling or idea of being alone. Because I knew right then if I lost Suzuna I would have no family left. No sister, no father, no-.

Realisation dawned on me and my throat thickened. I could feel my eyes widening with every breath I took. It didn't feel right, I shouldn't just be here to see my sister, what about my mother. Where was she? Where's my Mum?

_'Mum! No, no no-.'_

A door slammed shut in my mind. I just couldn't think of it right now. I couldn't afford to be sidetracked from this right now and possibly not melt down when I needed to focus on my sister. I need to hear what the Dr Murata has to say. I need to know everything I can do to help her. I need to do it for my mother. Be strong.

_'Focus Misaki. Focus.'_

Swallowing, I gazed down at my whitening knuckles. The material of my skirt being crushed by my tightened fists. I must have been in this position for a while as my tight grip cramped all the way to the tips of my fingers. The pain was a welcome distraction to the numbing disorientation that still lingered.

With much concentration I managed to loosen my strangling death grip on my skirt and let go. Flexing my fingers out, I glanced back up to Dr Murata and waited for his synopsis on Suzuna.

With a final flick through his pile, Dr Murata cleared his throat with a grunt. Indicating that he was ready to begin. His eyes speaking soundless words of sympathy as he looked up at me. I knew what he was about to say wasn't going to be good news. But I needed to hear, so I braced myself.

"Miss Ayuwaza let me begin by expressing my deepest condolences for the loss of your mother."

_'Oh god.'_ My throat feels thick.

"I understand this is all quite hard and sudden for you to take in right now, so please if you need anything or need me to re-explain anything let me know. We will-."

The volume level of his voice lowered to a mute but his lips continued to move. I couldn't continue concentrating on what Dr Murata was saying as my mind was beginning to zoned out again. Only this time I was more aware of the situation. It was almost like a dream, sitting in the backseat of a moving vehicle while watching myself letting go of the steering wheel. Or like my inner self locked in a glass shell, smacking and yelling at me from within my prison in frustration. Maybe this was my way of protecting myself, or a side effect of shock. Either way I'd rather be in a complete state of oblivion or in total control of myself than siting on the fence, trying to kick start my mind while everything around me played out like a silent movie.

'_Wake up. Wake up. WAKE UP!'_

Click.

Jolting out of my reverie with the sudden noise, I noticed Dr Murata had stopped talking as well and was looking past me. Glancing over my shoulder I confirmed that Usui had entered the room and was approaching the chair next to my own. His eyes locked with mine as he lowered himself into his chair. That brief moment of connection of familiarity giving me enough strength to face forward again.

"Now since we're all here lets get straight to the issue." Folding his hands in front of him, Dr Murata sat up in his seat to address us. "Suzuna's case is classified under a moderate to severe level of traumatic brain injury. What this means is the impact of the accident has forced her head to move in a way that the brain has ricocheted within the skull. When this happens the blood vessels and tissues surrounding the brain over stretch, then compress, and get torn."

I could feel my eyes widening, my hands gripping the edge of the seats to the sides of me. It was hard mentally picturing Suzuna in such a damaged state. Just seeing her a moment ago, she didn't have the appearance of someone with a brain injury. It was all internal.

"Will- will it heal?" I stammered out.

"Yes with time." with a nod, the Doctor continued. "When Suzuna was brought here, she was already in a state of deep unconsciousness, which eventually she would've woken up from but it would not help Suzuna's state. What we've done to assist with her healing is put her into an induced coma which is only temporary. This will enable her brain to concentrate on healing itself rather then spending needed energy working the rest of her body."

"So the coma is a good thing? I always thought they weren't." Fidgeting in my seat I felt some spark of relief with this new piece of knowledge. Glancing at my companion next to me, I noticed Usui's brow was furrowed in thought. "Usui?"

With the mention of his name Usui gazed back at me with a small smile.

"Misa, they're generally not." Usui spoke gently. Looking back at the doctor he continued. "But you said this coma was induced, so that means you have more control over Suzuna's state."

"That is correct, yes." Pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose, the Doctor looked at Usui with interest. "If the patient comes in already comatose, we can only monitor the progress and make assumptions. But we can't force them to wake up. That is up to the brain and can be at times unpredictable. But because in this case with Suzuna we have forced her brain into this state, we can observe and help her healing. Once her brain has healed enough of the damage-."

"Then you can wake her up." Usui finished.

I felt that spark of hope again when the doctor nodded once more. It's possible, that everything will turn out to be ok. It's possible. Suzuna will wake up, be ok and get off that hospital bed and come home and everything will be that way it was. This nightmare will end and Suzuna will tell me about all the competitions she's just won and all the unusual prizes we'll be expecting in the mail. Mum will cut up some bunny apples and join us at the table. And everything would be just as it should.

But that image itself was just a fading dream. And that small spark of hope diminished itself.

With downcast eyes I continued listening as Dr Murata kept on. "As for the extent of damage to Suzuna's cerebrum, I can't give you an answer yet until we do a CAT scan. We've scheduled Miss Ayuwaza within the next few hours and hopefully, no, we should have a result by tomorrow. Once we get the results we can give you a call-."

"No," I interrupted, my own voice feeling foreign to me as I spoke without thinking. "I'll be here."

"Of course." The doctor inclined his head and nodded at my response. "Once we've analysed the scans we'll have more of an idea of her state. And then we'll decide the best course of action and the type of treatment that would be suited for Suzuna. But for now she will stay here in the Intensive Care ward. The nurses and myself will keep monitoring Suzuna's respirations and circulation cycle. At this early stage it is most important to keep her system under constant observation."

I nodded my head in understanding but continued to stare at the space in front of me. It was a miracle that I was able to grasp any of what he said.

"Now, I know you're not ready to begin talking about this. No one ever is." The Doctors tone softened.

"But you do need to be aware of the current situation with your mother."

Oh god. I could feel my heart begin to slow.

"And there are arrangements and decisions that will require your assistance, but you won't be troubled with this for another few days. I've passed your contact details onto the Funeral Directors that will be-."

Please. I couldn't listen to this. I just couldn't. My mind had drawn an invisible line to how much I could take in. I thought I was doing alright before. I had managed to listen well enough but now it felt like my line was being stepped over. I'm not ready for this.

"I know this is hard and you're far too young to be in this position. But to make this easier for yourself, is there any other member of your family I can contact for you? A close friend of your mother perhaps?"

I couldn't answer. My heart had frozen, oxygen constricted within my throat. I felt a wave of dread overcome me with his questions. I was alone. My mother had been an only child and my grandparents had passed when Suzuna and I were younger. And my father had long since vanished. I didn't have anyone to turn to for help.

_'I am alone.'_

I gripped the armrest for support as my eyes met with Dr Muratas. His eyes showing no signs of impatience for my answer, only a hint of eagerness. I knew he was only trying to help, Dr Murata wasn't the bad guy. He was probably well accustomed to these situations with his line of profession. And that was mostly likely never an easy task for anyone. With a small shake of my head as my answer, I could see the hint of hopefulness fade as he nodded acknowledgment in turn.

_'I'm not ready for this.'_

I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream, yell, punch at something. Anything. In anger. In sadness. I was struggling to swallow, and to hold in my grief. My bottled up emotions were causing my head to throb painfully. It all felt too surreal. This is something that happens in movies. Or something you hear from a friend of a friend who new someone.

_'Not to us. Not to a small family struggling to get by as is.'_

I could feel warm, strong fingers weave around my own. That affectionate show of comfort and support that could only come from Usui. The guy that believed in me, gave me strength and at times, could also melt down my barriers when I was just being too stubborn. Usui's fingers linked with mine. Palms pressed tightly together, his grip as strong as my own. Keeping me together but offering me reassurance that he was there at the same time.

* * *

><p>I don't remember much of the way home. It was more of a blur. Almost like walking through a hazy dream and not realising your moving your limbs. Your on autopilot. Physically you're there but no one is home.<p>

Fingers hold on to hand rails and press the button at your stop. You can't hear at all yet you still know when to stop at the cross walk, when the green man is flashing and playing its signal indicating you can cross. Somehow weaving between pedestrians on the busy city night and not bumping into anyone. But then, that may have been controlled by my companion who stayed close behind me the entire time.

Dr Murata had advised that I should go home to rest after the long, emotional day I just had. Being too stubborn to leave my sisters side I politely refused and stayed on the metal seat by her window. Watching the people passing by numbly. Unaware of anything but the grey wall opposite me. Waiting for something, anything. Usui, who had been sitting next to me quietly was eventually targeted by the Doctor after a few hours and was forced into taking me home. Something along the lines of being for my own wellbeing. I hadn't felt his arm around my shoulders guiding me down the corridors. The descent down in the lift, through the foyer and out the door.

The next thing I knew I was standing at the gate to my home. The streets were dark and empty. Quiet for the late hour. I stood staring at my building. The paint on the side of the house was cracking. The front yard needing a bit of maintenance and care. But what most disturbed me was the darkness inside. Curtains were still open from the day, no lights were on, not even the faint glow from the kitchen could be seen. Normally left on for me when I got home late from work.

The house was empty.

The gate creaked open as I stepped through. My fingers digging numbly into my bag, reaching for the cool metal of my keys at the bottom. As soon as I reach the door the key slides easily into the lock, with a turn the door swings open.

"Misa."

I look back and to see Usui standing behind. His green eyes dark in the moonlight, the blond of his hair pale and glowing. The concern evident on his handsome features.

"Misa are you sure you'll be ok tonight? I can stay with you if you like. Or.. you can stay at mine?" His head cocked to the side, a gentle half-smile formed.

"N-no you, pervert!" With a grimace and quick shake of my head in refusal. "Who would stay with the likes of you?!"

With a soft chuckle Usui stepped closer and rested a hand on my shoulder. The other bringing a bag up between us. I stared at it curiously before looking back up to Usui in question.

With a sad smile Usui spoke, "They gave this to me earlier, before I joined you in the Doctors office."

His hand that rested on my shoulder slid down the length of my arm and reached my hand. Guiding my fingers to take the handles of the bag.

"It's what they managed to recover of your mothers belongings." Usui said with difficulty.

My breath hitched. The bag felt heavier, like its contents held the weight of the world inside. I gripped the handles tightly in fear of dropping these possessions. I didn't want to look inside though. It would be like waking up to reality and I wasn't ready for that. Not yet anyway and certainly not out in the street with Usui to bare witness.

I choked out what I thought sounded like a thank you but ended up giving a quick nod. I could feel my bottled emotions starting to splinter the glass shell that was already fragile enough as is.

"I- I need to be alone now." I managed to splutter out. Because I really did. Usui may be my strength, but he's also my weakness.

"Are you sure? I'll be where ever you want me to be." With a pause, Usui cradled my chin in his fingers. Carefully tilted my head up and spoke softly, "You don't have to be alone Misa."

Peering up into his depths I could see the pain mixed in with the adoration he felt for me. His anxiousness rolling off him in waves. For once I could read what was going on his mind. Usui's intention to protect and stay with me throughout this nightmare. And I knew that's what he wanted for me to be aware of. It made my chest ache, and my throat tighten once more.

_'Please don't look at me like that. I need to keep it together just that bit longer.'_

With my free hand I gripped the front of Usui's shirt and lent my head against his chest, "I'm not that fragile. I can take care of myself."

Looking up, I pushed away from him for some space between us. Giving myself room to compose enough and escape before shattering in his arms.

"Bu-but thank you... For today.. I don't know what I would've done if you hadn't been there with me."

"Misa-."

I took a step back as soon as he moved closer, keeping the distance. I forced a reassuring smile on my face as I glanced back up to see Usui's worried expression.

"I'll be ok." I crossed over the threshold of my home and faced Usui. "Thanks for walking me back... Goodnight."

I closed the front door quickly before he could give a response. My face fell instantly as soon as the door was closed. Pressing my forehead against the surface, I breathed deeply to ease the pain in my chest. Let the air travel to my lungs as I tried to calm myself down. It was then I felt the stiff handles of the bag still gripped tightly in my hand. Looking down at the bag made the blood rush from my head. I tried shaking my head to clear the light-headedness away only to make myself dizzy.

Turning around slowly I faced the darkness of my home. The hallway seemed to stretch and twist ahead of me. Floor boards patchy in places and walls discoloured. I used the beam against the wall as a brace as I slipped out of my shoes and stepped onto the landing. My sight fell on the scattered markings lining up the wall. Lines drawn over the years by my mother, keeping measurement of her daughters growth. Suzuna's measurements were always just under my own. My eyes trailed along the floor to see the mended floorboards where mother and Suzuna both stepped through.

My heart caught in my throat as I noticed my mothers coat lying untouched on top a chair next to the wall. I tried to swallow but I choked. Drawing my hand against my chest, my attention was drawn to the bag still clutched within my hand.

_'Mum's belongings.'_

It was a struggle to breath as I shook trying to open and see the contents. In the darkness of the hall I could make out her purse, a comb, the glint of some of her jewellery, her work ID...

I cried out as reality hit. These are her belongings. These are my mothers items. They should be on her not with me.

My head throbbed as the contained tears started to leak out. The agonising pain working its way down into my heart.

It didn't matter that our house was run down. Or that we were poor. It didn't matter that we had to fend for ourselves. We faced things on together as a family and still laughed anyway.

_'We were happy..'_

My knees touched the group as I broke into pieces.

In the empty darkness of my home.

* * *

><p><em>End of Chapter 4<em>

_I have a few one-shots that I'm planning out at the moment... not sad ones, but more musings than anything.. they may end up 'M' rated. But now I'd like to focus on them before I carry on writing Chapter 5._

_Please R&R & let me know what you think :)_

_-tinynarna_


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